A Down Syndrome Blog Hop: One Truth, One Tip, One Photo

24 Jul

I love blog hops, because they are a chance to read a lot of people’s thoughts on the same topic, and everything is neatly gathered in one place.

This one, begun on July 21, is a community hop hosted by a Down syndrome writers’ group that I belong to. It’s really the brainchild of Meriah at With a Little Moxie, so be sure to check out her site.

The theme of the hop is (3) on the 21st  — One truth, one tip, and one photo.

(You can also host the hop on your own blog, by grabbing the code at the bottom. Wish me luck as I try it).

ONE TRUTH

 I’m really bad about working on academic skills with my son

I try, I do, just not that hard. Why?  It’s too frustrating, because he either doesn’t want to listen to me or just isn’t ready to do the task. And frankly, I don’t want to listen to myself either. I am impatient and easily frustrated, and the amount of repetition that needs to occur in order for the lesson to be successful is mind numbingly high. So I mostly leave that to the schools and the therapists and the summer camps and I focus on it for about 80 seconds a day. Instead, we work on behavior (“No potty words!”), social skills (“Don’t bite your sister!”) and self-help (“Your pants are on backwards and your shoes are on the wrong feet, but great job!” And I really mean this; I think it’s awesome that he can dress himself at age 4 1/2).

He is doing fabulous; I am happy and the days have a poetry all their own.

ONE TIP

Sometimes helpmates are where you find them, not where you look for them. Open your mind.

Some of my favorite memories are created when my son really connects with someone who hasn’t been vetted, recommended, researched or background-checked. He has some wonderful teachers and therapists in his life, but the ordinary people (or other creatures) he encounters at ordinary moments have a magic all their own.

One of the first people who got him to count 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, when he was younger was my nattily dressed hair stylist, who owns a salon in the city and would let me drag all my kids with me from the suburbs — he really had an affinity for my son. I couldn’t believe it when I heard him prompting my son to count while I stepped into the restroom.

The list of delightful encounters goes on: the fellow mom in the waiting room who shares her iPad; the 6-year-old girl at our daughter’s gymnastics center who befriended our son for no reason in particular other than that she likes him, and now he runs into her arms immediately upon seeing her; the tiny toddler who brings out our son’s protective instincts and tells him “no” when his naughty side starts to show; the neighborhood dads who toss him a ball and whom he consistently badgers to pick him up (“Daddy – up, UP!!”); the neighborhood dog who guards him like a sentry while he wails after getting scolded for yet another dangerous infraction. Perhaps his most important helpmate besides his twin has been his big sister. Though still only 7, she has taught him how to swim, how to eat his food properly and how to play countless games. Throughout his life, she has succeeded where I have failed, stepping in effortlessly without being asked and making things better.

Trust other children to be your child’s most remarkable teachers. Watch for the few, or even the one, who clicks with your child and just enjoy the ride.

ONE PHOTO

Nino beach web edit

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4 Responses to “A Down Syndrome Blog Hop: One Truth, One Tip, One Photo”

  1. jisun July 24, 2013 at 2:52 am #

    Love! I especially liked reading the little stories about helpmates. Life provides a lot if we try to be open to it. :)

    • modernmessy July 24, 2013 at 11:20 am #

      Thanks Jisun! I completely agree with what you said; the universe has sure been good to us, anyway.

  2. JL July 24, 2013 at 9:53 pm #

    Valentino is so handsome! Everytime I see pics of him he takes my breath away!

    Love your posts!

    Sent from my iPhone

    • modernmessy July 24, 2013 at 11:27 pm #

      Thanks so much, Jiming, you are so sweet to say that! He is pretty cute and he photographs well, if i do say so myself :) Thanks for reading.

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